what have you learned?

My facebook status summary of 4+ pages of processing...
  

este noche, durante la cena, el abuelo me preguntó que aprendí durante mi tiempo en Guatemala.  Cultura, idioma, un montón de curiosidades al azar , y lo más importante, como amar y aceptar el amor en cambio.  No me di cuenta de lo cierto que era hasta que me empezó a decir adiós a todos mis amigos ... siendo muchos amado y amar duele, pero es tan increíblemente la pena.

tonight at dinner, the abuelo asked me what i had learned in Guatemala. Culture, language, lots of random trivia, and most importantly, how to love and accept love in return. i didn't realize how true that was until i started saying all my goodbyes... being loved and loving lots hurts, but it's so incredibly worth it.

Lessons from tears...

Why are we so afraid of emotions?

I have never been one to cry… it’s just not something I have been accustomed to doing.  It’s not that I think it’s weird or weak; in fact, I am often jealous of the people who can cry.  And I have come to respect them and admire them and want to be more like them.

Over the past week, I have seen my host mom cry every day.  Monday, it was during lunch when a good friend studying in Cuba came to eat with us.  He, his brother, and Porfi are amazingly close friends and when they’re together, they are hilarious (even to me who understands about 25% of their jokes).  They’re so funny that they would get Elly crying; tears streaming down her face.  Then, she would take off her glasses, wipe her eyes, and just as she almost had herself composed, they would say something and we’d be back to square one of tears streaming down her face.  It was amazing and authentic: a woman from a closed, indigenous community crying freely not because she is sad but solely because she loves life and has so much happiness that it has no way to express itself other than through tears.  Beautiful.

Then we had Tuesday.  I was brushing my teeth at night, admiring the lightning behind the mountains separating us from the warm (wet) coastal area when I looked up and saw gorgeous stars.  I ran to the kitchen door jumping up and down and pointing up (still with my toothbrush).  “Night, night” Elly said… but that wasn’t the point.  Finally, after a lot of pantomiming, I finally ran to the Pila to take my toothbrush out and said, “Mira!  Estrellas!”  She came out excitedly and by the time I had turned around from washing my face, she was lying down in the middle of our patio (which is shared with the duck, chickens, dog, cats, and whatever else comes our way… aka not clean), starring at the stars.  I joined her and as we laid there, watching the stars, we talked about how small we are in comparison to God, the earth’s rotation, and constellations.  She said, “I don’t know any constellations, I just enjoy the stars” and I said, “Oh!  I know some!  Umm…(as I looked around through the sky frantically searching for the big dipper) just not any here”  Elly burst into laughter and as we laid on the cold pavement under the magnificent stars, she once again had tears running down her face. Tears of sadness that our time together is coming to a close, and tears of laughter. 

Then, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, her tears were of sadness and being overwhelmed, but she wasn’t afraid to show that emotion as well.  First, there was some very painful family drama.  Then, a cousin who was like a brother died of a heart attack at age 37 and we were in charge of the services (that post is to come…my inside look at funerals was fascinating). We had some amazing talks through it and she opened up and cried when we talked in the restaurant where she is the cook, in our internet café, at the dinner table, on the bus, everywhere.  She freely expressed herself, which during a week like the one we had, is the healthiest thing that she could do. 

One of the greatest girls ever...

The last few days, I have learned to cry too.  Watching my host mom, who I now call “Mama” and she calls me her “hija” show emotions and express herself has given me permission to love, show emotions, and express what I feel as well.  I teared up saying goodbye to each of my three host families in Xela.  I had tears streaming down my face as students came up to me with tears streaming down theirs, holding a card that they had made.  I am choking up now as I write this.  

I am allowed to cry because those around me have given me permission and shown me how it’s done.  This year, I have cried from laughter after our students do something super funny or almost every night at the dinner table here.  I have cried in front of people as I have left them.  I have cried with people in their pain.  I can cry because tears show love.  Love for one another, love for self expression, and love for life.  

I am so grateful for my lessons.  So grateful for this year.  So grateful for life.  So grateful for tears.

Simply grateful.

Orange Juice Lady

Sometimes we find friends in the most unexpected places.

My orange juice lady is one of those.

We talk about the weather, about the people who go to her stand, about life.

She invited me to go with her to church for dia de la madre after her daughter died.

I vented to her about my appendix and frequent moves.

We're friends and I'll miss her.

As she always says when I leave, "Dios le benedice"

Gracias, Orange Juice lady.  You have taught me what friendship truly is.

Walking through the room

For the past month, I've kept a tally of the funny things that go through my room... for those of you who don't know, my room is one of the two entries into the house (the other our internet shop) so it leads to fun things.  I absolutely love it!

Here are some highlights:

• -          50lb bags of fertilizer
• -      The (always drunk) 90 year old farm helper... Porfi says he's immortal
• -          A wheelbarrow full of clothes and two small trees
• -          Pig slop
• -          A dog
• -          Slugs
• -          Lots of old people, some of whom can’t walk so I help lift them into the room
• -          All the scrap metal we have to sell at 35 centavos/lb… that’s about 12cents maybe…
• -          Giant bucket of rotten fruits and veggies and old food going to the pig slop bucket so it can be mixed and then carried through my room again to the pigs at a later time.
• -          Mama chicken and her 3 babies
• -      The duck who is also functions as my roommate (he definitely sleeps there when I'm not around as evidenced by random pieces of corn and duck prints on the floor)
• -          A wheelbarrow full of trash to take to “the hills”
• -          Abuela with a glass of milk from the milk lady who has her 2 goats right outside the door (Knock Knock CABROS Knock Knock)

And... another one bites the dust

 (from:

http://query.nytimes.com/mem/archive-free/pdf?res=FA0E11FD355F13718DDDAE0894DA405B848CF1D3)

Evidently, it's an epidemic in Guatemala too.

So, 7 weeks ago, I got appendicitis.  It was an adventure.  I'll save the details for coffee dates.
Then, 6 weeks ago, Sandra Torres, the first lady and illegal presidential candidate who isn't a candidate but thinks she is, got appendicitis.
A day after Sandra, Paty, one of our teachers, got appendicitis.
Then, 3 weeks ago, Dany, another teacher, got appendicitis.
Then, a day ago, Gloria, a student and a member of my first family in Xela, got appendicitis.

Being a trendsetter is often what people want in life, but in this situation, it's OVER RATED! 

Sorry, friends!


And... for more...

http://www.statesman.com/blogs/content/shared-gen/blogs/austin/health/entries/2010/01/19/appendicitis_could_be_contagio.html

NBA

Negros Bien Alto

Yep!  That's the nickname for the group of extranjeros who are here in Cantel this month.  They are a bunch of basketball players, mostly Black, who are working in the rural public schools teaching basketball, among other things.  My host mom was telling me how great they are and how much difference they have made over the past 10 years they've been here as we were walking to the Fabrica and suddenly, a truckload of them came barreling down the (GORGEOUS) hilly road all standing and taking pictures with their iPhones.

Amazing.

Talking about amazing... we have another group at our school this week.  They're an education delegation led by the same family who led last week's medical delegation.  They're here teaching about earth/gardening stuff, building stuff, and (the reason the other things are so vague...) teaching english!  Yep!  That's right... I have 9 helper teachers... along with my 2 other helper teachers here for 8 weeks as I supervise them for a college internship.  So, that, my mathematical friends, is 13 teachers teaching every class.  Almost a 2:1 ratio for every class!  It's so great.  We're doing so many conversations and stations and other activities that I've never been able to do because I'm in a 30:1 ratio classroom with kids who don't have any of the discipline practices I'm used to and therefore struggle with any changes in pace or activity (their classes literally spend 80% of their time copying things in notebooks.  Including 6-8 pages of continuous letters practicing cursive... an activity done in grades 1-9). 

I've been thinking and talking to Elly.  I have a lot of ideas for programs and connections I'd like to make between Walla Walla and here in the Western Highlands.  The NBA and these delegations have inspired me... now, primero Dios, we can make it happen.

I don't want to lose this world nor my friends here
and I really want my friends in the States to meet them
and likewise, I want my friends here to meet my friends in the States

I have learned a whole lot from these people and they have learned a lot from me...
now it's time to make our real life classroom bigger... just praying for guidance in how.

And in the meantime, I'm going to enjoy and love these people here, be grateful for our volunteers at school, and keep my eyes out for the NBA

Aventuras con mi hermano...

So, I have this host brother.  Porfi. 

He's pretty cool. 

We have a whole lot of fun together, but sadly, our time is usually limited because of our conflict of work schedules and his ridiculously busy church schedule (sounds familiar?  yes). 

However, this weekend, we decided to have some fun together!  

We are both pretty active people and since appendicitis, I've been pretty stinkin' lame, so it was fun to get moving again.  

Friday, after work, I came home and we got packed up to go to the pool.  Yes, it was pouring down rain.  Yes, the abuela was convinced that we were going to die.  Yes, it was a bit cold, but the pool is heated by HOT SPRINGS!  And, since everyone else in the world was hiding from the rain, we had it all to ourselves.  So, anyways, we went to the pool and swam around.  I introduced Porfi to the concept of goggles... I think it changed his world (but it did take him a while to get the courage up to try them on).  After he finally put them on, he barely spent anytime above water!  

Saturday, we went on an adventure to two nearby cities.  We walked through the mountain pass to the agricultural town of Almolonga.  This town has a ton of different crops and is gorgeous.  It was crazy how different it is from Cantel considering it is only an hour walk away.  The crops are different (we only do corn here), there are a lot more people who own cars there (probably because, as Porfi said, they diversify their crops so they actually make money), it was sunny on that side of the mountain and not ours, and there were pools!!!  (but Cantellians are still nicer in my opinion so I'll stick with my pueblo :) )  After Almolonga and going through the markets where they prepare food to sell for export, we jumped on a bus for Zunil.  Zunil is also very agricultural, but it was super cold, has a really old church, and the people there dress incredibly colorfully.  Yet again, very different and only a 15 minute bus ride away.  After Zunil, we returned home in time for lunch with the abuelos and for Porfi to go to work at our internet cafe.  

Sadly, I didn't have my camera for either day =(  Sorry!

Sunday, however, Porfi brought his phone with a camera, so I have some evidence.  We spent the morning watching the world's most beautiful sunrise at 5:30

At 6, we were walking down our hill to meet up with all of Porfi's friends from church to plant 250 little trees for the Municipality to help landslide control

The trees in the back of a pick up

We brought Machetes and ground whackers (official term) and about 20 of us just hacked away planting up a storm

Carlos and I working up on the hill... we planted 30 trees up there!

You clear away the ground like this with the ground whacker and then use the machete to make a hole and then goes in the tree!7

Yep!  The gringa got the ground whacker!

We all worked on the hillside

One of these people is not like the others...

  It was a really fun morning.  Afterwards, we went and they played for their team in the Catholic Jovenes soccer tournament.  Both the men's and women's teams won, 5-1.  All in all, a really fun morning (you don't do stuff in the afternoon here... it just rains) and we got home before the super ridiculously strong storm! 

I'm fairly certain that if I could speak their language and culture, these guys would be some of my best friends, especially if I lived here.  We have so much in common.

and now, my challenge to myself is to figure out how to bring these examples of community they have taught me and make them a part of my life in Walla Walla...

Jornada Medica!!! Mas!!!!!

This past week was one of the best weeks I have had in Guatemala (I say this a lot, because it’s true… I’ve had many “best weeks” here… I guess that’s what happens when you live in an environment where God is constantly rocking your world).  The week was a “Medica Jornada” where we had 26 doctors from the US, primarily Pennsylvania, come and check out our students, their families, the orphans and their caretakers from down the street, and kids from two feeding programs as well as a lot of random people. We had hundreds of patients and they got full service.  They got to get their eyes checked and received glasses if necessary (really attractive glasses at that… let’s just say there’s a whole bunch of aviators in Quetzaltenango now), their ears checked so at last they now know if they are deaf or not (there are so many times that I asked someone, “do you have trouble hearing?” “What?” and after about 4 tries, they’d answer, “Oh no, I hear just fine”), Dentists looked at their teeth and took out a shockingly and disgustingly high number of teeth from the mouths of people of all ages, and a general check up as well.  It was awesome.  

My job for this trip was to translate for the check-in/triage nurse. This was awesome because I got to talk about everything from allergies to the sun to hysterectomies.  I have a dream of someday hosting short-term teams here in Guatemala (that is if I can learn better Spanish, get established independently, and find a program that I’m passionate about as well as overcoming the hurdle of separating myself from the Walla Walla and Gig Harbor communities, so let’s not hold our breath that this will happen, but it is a dream and desire for my life… one of many!!), and doing that on a smaller level (translating, answering some questions, having insanely long hours but not being solely in charge) was really cool to see that yes, this is a huge passion of mine. 

I also learned about two other passions I have: helping people communicate and helping people get better.  Translating for a medical team really allows for both to happen.  I loved seeing two people from completely different worlds (my nurse from rural Pennsylvania and the woman from urban Qutezaltenango) be able to communicate, and being that bridge for their communication was really incredible.    I also loved seeing people receive medications, glasses, explanations, or dental care (aka teeth taken out and the resulting bloody mouths) and get on the road for health and healing.  To be a part of a community of people dedicated to help the health of these complete strangers was insanely awesome.

I also had some personal satisfaction.  My students and their families all came in so during down times or at least when I had their intakes, I got to play with them, give them high 5, or do something else to remind them that they’re loved.  I love these students – all 220 of them – so it was great to hang out with them in that way.  There’s just something to be said about hanging out with them when they’re not in their formal school uniforms.   

 

I also got to see how God works and helps me accomplish my goals.  When I heard about the Jornada in October, I was nervous.  I really wanted to help translate for it but I was also very aware that my language skills were lacking and, although knowing your colors, shapes, and names of food is helpful, it’s not quite sufficient for explaining to foreign doctors what’s up with their patient. In April, I was still really nervous about it.  I had learned some medical words from my various stomach revolting issues, but not very much.  At the end of May, this jornada was still on my mind and I was nervous.  Yes, I was living with a family so my conversation skills were improving, but my medical terminology was definitely not. Then I got appendicitis.  That taught me a lot of medical terminology including appendix, stitches, pain, and surgery.  It also taught me about the medical system here and I was able to understand better what world these patients come from (from my experience, the use of gloves, asking for medical history, ear and eye exams, and a lot of other things we take for granted is not here so us having it was confusing for some).  Finally, I gained a great respect for nurses and people who have to take intake information.  It’s a hard job – hard to get the information, to make the people comfortable there, and to hear some of their stories.

I want to share with you some of the stories that I heard…

There was the lady who was chronically nervous after her son was shot 8 years ago.  She kept talking about her nervousness and how it has led to high blood pressure, diabetes, and increased “manchas” (spots… often freckles) on her face.  I finally asked her what she was nervous about and she said that her son was shot 8 years ago after borrowing money from a friend and not paying it back in time.  Although he was shot two zones away, she was still really scared and lived alone in one of the most notoriously dangerous zones in the city.  What a sad, terrifying way to live…

Quick break to talk about education... I can't tell you how many people talked to me about their manchas - their spots on their face - aka freckles.  They were concerned that they had them and asked for lotion to make them disappear.  That is just one, very minor, example of how grateful I am for my medical education that comes with my nationality and social class...

There was also a lady who was complaining of headaches that she had had for just over two years.  She was really sure of the time so I finally asked her, what happened two years ago, any trauma?  And she told me that her boyfriend at the time kicked her in the face and threw her against the wall.   No wonder her head hurts.  Then, from there, we began talking about safe, healthy relationships and how they’re sometimes hard to come by but totally worth it when they do.

And, there was the 19 year-old who came in with her mom and looked terrified.  After a bit of talking, we realized that she was over two months late on her period and she was afraid that she was pregnant.  She didn’t know how to find out so she had waited for the Jornada to ask.  So, she came in and met with us and then a doc from the States. The doctor sent her to get a pregnancy test and told her to come back with the results.  The girl came back the next day and looked absolutely terrified.  She saw me and gave me the (still sealed) envelope with the results.  SHE HADN’T OPENED IT!  I went to get the doctor and we looked at it and it was negative.  This poor, exhausted, obviously terrified and sleep-deprived girl looked so relieved and confused and happy and more confused.  Then, I translated for (and of course contributed in) a 20 minute conversation about the importance of birth control, condoms, protection, and saying no to guys taking advantage of you.  It was amazing to have conversations that need so much to be heard happen here like that. 

There was also an older patient who had a pulse of 40… another with a blood sugar of 378 after 12 hours of fast.  Giving these people the facts and resources to help them get their vital stats on track was so great.

Then, there was the group that broke my heart.  We have four students at our school from a rural aldea near Lago Atitlan.  Their first language is K’itche and Spanish is a second.  I don’t know how our school found them, but boy have they stolen my heart!  Anyways, they live in Xela, three of them together and the other working to earn food and housing as a servant in the house of two students at our school (that’s a whole other story).  Their families all live hours away.  But, they told their families who told their families who told their families and we had probably around 70 patients who came in.  They piled in the back of their truck Wednesday morning under a tarp and arrived at the school by 6am in order to have sufficient time to register for our 8am start. It was crazy!  Ages 1 month to 90!   And, to make matters crazier, many didn’t speak Spanish.   These people have incredibly limited resources so some of their stories are the most heartbreaking/reminding for me about how much I have…

There was the older woman who is deaf and mute. Her daughter, who understood her crazy motions spoke K’itche.  One of our students who is family to them told me in Spanish what the daughter said, and then I told the nurse in English.  Yes - four languages… one of which isn’t even real (family known motions…)  We managed to explain everything to her and even got her blood sugar taken without too much surprise.  It was awesome. The hardest thing with that group was that she was one of seven who was having intake together and as I would talk to one of her relatives, she would move her hands wildly waiting for her daughter to translate.  When she did, it was always about how happy this woman was because God had blessed her with the opportunity to come.  So inspiring!

There was another family who had a little seven month old boy.  During intake, she looked at me in the eyes and said, in Spanish,  “My little boy has something wrong”.  She showed me his ears.  One was normal sized and the other the size of a newborn’s ears.  He was deaf on one ear, maybe two, and without x-rays and the possible surgery, there’s nothing we can do.  To get x-rays, this family would probably have to choose between dinner for a month or x-rays, so it’s possible that nothing will ever happen.  That sucks.  I want to help people! 

 

The cousin of this boy was five years old.  But, he was the size of an 18-month to 2 year old.  He was so small and had the little tummy of starvation (more bloated than tummy).  It was heartbreaking to see him and talk to his mom and just realize how little understanding they have of nutrition.  

Then, there was another boy who had been having stomach pains for 3 years.  After talking for a bit with the mom, she finally said that it started when he was playing and a pila (a giant sink) fell on him and crushed his stomach.  He went to the ER and had surgery but it still hurts.  Wow.  I have so much empathy for stomach surgery pain!

Finally, there was the dentist.  This was my favorite because of the juxtaposition.  There was constant screaming, wailing, and tears coming from there.  We only did extractions so there was very little to be overjoyed about.  One girl from our preschool class was in the dentist and screamed bloody murder the entire time.  Hannah, our volunteer who was translating, had tears streaming down her face.  It was so hard to see so much pain.  Yet, we all knew it was for the better.  And the dentists, some of my new life teachers, always had a smile on their faces and never complained.  They knew they were saving kids faces from rotting off and although it was a bit uncomfortable at the moment, it would be for the best.  They saw the big picture and let that provide them happiness.  Way to go dentists!

Well, that’s all the stories for today.  I’m sure more will come with time (and after I can communicate and think in one language and clearly… which may take a while... I'm linguistically toast right now!)

Katharine 

(Thanks to our triage nurse, Laurie, for the pictures!)